Friday, 15 July 2016

Days of Gratitude - A Pile Of Rubbish And A Whole Load Of Smush

Yes, another five days from the positives I've found for the Sunday Assembly Gratitude Group.  These were among the hardest days I've had in quite a while in terms of mental health.  For three days of the five I was basically not able to go out.  Days of struggling.  Days of trying not to get too disheartened in the period before it began to feel better again.

On some days it's hard to find positives.  On some days it's even harder to intentionally do positive things.  And yet, there were positives.  And even on those staying at home with my head simultaneously exploding and imploding and the rising up of panic and my senses playing havoc, even on those days I was able to do some positive things.  Some new things.  Some things that are preparing for parts of the future I would like to have.  That future is not mapped out much but I know that I keep taking steps towards achieving it.  Even on the days that I could easily write off as rubbish ones.  This may not be the day the Lord has made.   But in some way each day is the day I have made.  And I choose, as much as I can, to rejoice and be glad in it.  Or at least to see some good in it.

6th July

Grateful to have begun my quest to create a totally cosy art lounge. It's been a room full of junk and washing hangers that just happened to have a sofa bed.

Much work needed and much art to learn to do and play with so I can fill walls with it.

I have been writing more this year than in any year previously.  Since in previous years I wrote hardly anything that is not a great claim to fame.

But a story won't get these walls filled!

7th July

Grateful to have got through electrolysis.

 Grateful for the vacuum bags currently in Poundland.

 And grateful for a surprise dinner out with a friend.

8th July

Grateful to have got the art lounge at least to a state in which I can sit there for a while. Grateful to have finished reading a book there. The first completed book in quite a while.

Grateful for the absolutely amazing and surprising shapes made by the smoke from an incense stick. Glorious.

And grateful that all the stuff sorted for charity has finally gone to charity shops. All this stuff.

Ooh. Grateful for my hairbrush so I don't have to look like this all day.

9th July

Surprising myself by managing to complete both of the extra hard Numberlink puzzles they put up on Nikoli. There was a time I wouldn't even attempt the hard ones because I didn't stand a chance of doing them. And I completed these.

Also grateful to have made smushes (pronounced smwshes because of Manchester accent) for the first time. I don't think the blender we have can juice as smoothly as the juicers on the market. But it is what we have and it tasted okay.

10th July

Grateful to have managed to get out for the first time in three days.

Even if I went the wrong way three times and only completed half the planned walk.

A tree, a path and a river were good to see.

And grateful to have walked out some of the dren from my head.

This really was a walk for walking out my head.  The previous evening I had fallen very, very low in terms of my mental health.  It was actually a little scary.

Being able to get out and walk helped me a lot.  It wasn't though a walk for taking lots of pictures or for Blob to enjoy adventures.  This was me, regaining some sanity on a Sunday.

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